5 things I like/don't like about myself

Hmmm... 5 things I like about myself - this is hard. It feels like bragging, and if my Mom finds out I'm sure I'll still get a lecture about pride.

1. I'm a good cook. My husband and kids eat anything, so I get to try all kinds of stuff.
2. I'm a good storyteller. You're reading this blog aren't you?
3. I'm a good wife & Mom. My kids are healthy, happy and well adjusted. My marriage has survived 18 years, cancer, job losses, moving 9 times, seriously crazy family members, death of parents...
4. I'm a good housekeeper. It's not perfect, but I've channelled my little OCD's in a healthy way. : )
5. I'm good at making lists. That's kind of sad that the only thing I could come up with for number 5 is that I'm good at lists.

Don't Like: This is way easier. Only five? The hard part is narrowing the list down.

1. I can't take a compliment. If you tell me my jeans are nice, I'll tell you I only paid $10 for them. If you tell me my hair looks nice, I'l dismiss it. If you tell me you like a dish I prepared, I'll tell you it's nothing.
2. I eat as a comfort/crutch. Instead of prayer, my first reaction is a handful of...whatever can't run away from me.
3. I hate surprises and quick changes. I don't need to be in charge of the plan, but I need to know someone is, and that they know what's going on. Otherwise I quietly freak out and get annoyed.
4. I can't get up early to save my life. Honestly if my house catches fire between 1 and 7 am, I'm toast.
5. I can be selfish with my time. I don't have a lot of free time, and I'm pretty picky about how I spend it.
6. I hate exercising. I despise my weight, but refuse to do anything about it. Wait, I was supposed to stop at 5 wasn't I?

Seriously, you're not one of us!

My husband is a Pastor. I've spent more time in church over the past 20 years than most people will spend in a lifetime. In fact, I work at the church too(fairoakschurch.org), so I've spent more time at church since Monday than some people will in a lifetime. I'm okay with that. I like my church. I like my job. I like the ministry we're a part of. (I know I shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition - I notice every time, I just don't care). Anyway, both my husband and I grew up in very conservative homes. Those FLDS folks aren't too far removed from my background. Seriously. Eliminate the polygamy and the child brides and we're there. King James version of the Bible, dresses and long hair for women, women don't work outside the home - my parents were criticized for sending me to college - Bob Jones University no less - because since I had an education, I would always be tempted to step out and make money thus undermining my husband as Head of our Home. I wasn't allowed to go to movies, school dances, or date and was allowed limited time with friends who didn't attend the same church we did.

For the record, it's not how I'm raising my kids, and I'm confident they'll make far fewer stupid choices than I did because they're better informed and have more balance in their lives. Will they make mistakes. Oh, yeah. Will they break my heart? Possibly. Will I still love them? Definately.

In fairness, my parents were new to faith and got off on the wrong foot. I sincerely believe both my parents and the leadership of the church had pure motives. But, and there's always a big "but", they were sincerely off track. Waaay off track. My dad has since passed away, and my mom has found a balance.

This whole post was inspired by a YouTube video I watched yesterday. I was looking for Newspring Church(newspring.cc)but when I typed the pastor's name into the YouTube search engine, a pastor with a 10 minute rant against him was at the top of the list.

Now, I'm all about freedom of speech, everyone is entitiled to their opinion and for me to criticize & mock that man makes me no better than him. But, (there's that big but again) what is the point? How can he possibly think God is pleased with any of his ranting? Honestly. It's individuals like this guy that makes people think Christians are ALL narrow minded freaks muttering imprecatory Psalms and rejoicing every time an abortion clinic is blown up or someone dies of AIDS. "Smite another one Jesus!" we pray as we wring our hands and dance - actually we don't dance - that's sinful - as we walk through life.

Don't get me wrong, sin is sin, I belive God is very clear about what pleases and displeases Him. As a "survivor" of Fundamentalism, I realize have a biased opinion of that movement and should take care passing judgement. I simply believe God would be better served by us fighting the devil than each other. That's all.

Five Random Things

1. I like the smell of homemade bread. It reminds me of the days before my Mom lost her mind.

2. I hate chick flicks. I would rather have unanesthesized dental work than watch Sex & the City, read anything Nicholas Sparks has ever written - including his signature - or see any movie that could potentially be on Lifetime.

3. If I could quit my job and watch TV and movies all day, I would do it in a heart beat. I will watch anything starring Mike Meyers, Denzel Washington, Johnny Depp, James McEvoy, John Hannah, Judi Dench... I will not watch anything starring Sandra Bullock, Kate Hudson, Eva Longoria, Julia Roberts - Kathryn Heigel is a wild card - she was in Knocked Up before 27 Dresses

4. Toast is my favorite snack.

5. I had a dream that I was cheating on my husband with McLovin'. You heard me. McLovin. As in Superbad. I've been in love with Johnny Depp since High School, but a lisping, foul-mouthed teenager is my subconcious fantasy? I can't even imagine the level of therapy I need to get to the bottom of that one. Nevermind. I don't want to know.

Home of my Heart

I am homesick today. I'm homesick for a place I haven't lived in almost 25 years - Cape Breton - the island I grew up on. I realize that time allows us to romanticize our past and gloss over the reality of our memories. But it's where my heart is. It's where I grew up. It's an intergral part of who I am. I am proud to be a Canadian and proud to be from Cape Breton. Capers are proud & stubborn people who are fiercely protective of who they are and what is important to them. Sound familiar? My side of the island is predominantly Scottish and has produced the most amazing musicians. The music is Celtic, unique and beautiful. If you didn't grow up with it, it may not mean much, and may not be your taste. For me, it is the soundtrack to my childhood.

It's hard to explain why Cape Breton is still, and will always be, my home. If you've never lived one place for a long time or really identified with a culture, than this probably doesn't make much sense. I belong to Cape Breton. It's not just where I'm from, it's where I've been. I have friends that grew up on Long Island, and I think they feel the same way. Maybe it's an island thing. In the meantime, enjoy this little window into my home. The song is The Island, and the scenes are from all over Cape Breton. I didn't create the video - it's from YouTube (isn't everything?) Most of the scenes are very familiar to me.

I was listening to the radio in the car yesterday and nearly drove off the road trying to change the station when an ad for Jared Jewelers started playing. I HATE THEIR JINGLE. That's Jared! I cannot tell you how much it annoys me. Of course, since I'm sitting in traffic in Northern Virginia - a little window into hell - it got me thinking of other services and products I will never buy or use because of their jingle. In all fairness, this is no reflection on the quality of their product or service, it's just me. Music is a powerful thing - didn't you learn your ABC's as a song? How about conjunctions? "Conjunction Junction what's your function?" It's just that for me, their plan worked in reverse. Yes, I remember you, but I twitch when I hear your name. Jared isn't the jingle I hate most - it's just the one that triggered the sense memory of heinous jingles.


Daisy Sour Cream. Easily the jingle I hate most in the world. I hate it with the firey passion of a thousand suns.

Empire Flooring. A close second to Daisy,
the phone number then the voice sliding over the word Empire followed by TODAY! AAHHHHH! I will live with dirt floors before I use them for flooring.

Kraft Krumbles - They're krumbelievable! Mr. Ad Man, you deseve a boot to the berries for this one.


Folgers Coffee - If the best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup, your life sucks. Sorry. A fact's a fact.

Anyway, this has been somewhat theraputic. I'm better now.

Happy Mother's Day!

This was our Mother's Day Tribute at church last year. It's based on a sketch by the hilarious Barats and Bereta - we used their idea, made it G-rated for church - and this was the result. I think they did a pretty good job. Enjoy.

What's on your iPod?

I just bought the Wayne's World CD for $1 at the Library. It's one of my favorite guilty pleasures - I movie I stop and watch even if it's halfway through when I find it. I know it isn't fine art or high cinema - but dang it, it's funny. Twice a year the Library has a massive used book sale - it's awesome. I got 15 books by authors like Augusten Burroughs, Anita Shreve, Frank McCourt, Wally Lamb, Jed Rubenfeld ... AND my CD for $18! I felt like a fat kid at a buffet. Seriously - it was fan-freaken-tastic. I just wished I had remembered it in advance so I could have shopped more and spent more. >: ) Anyhoo, I've been listening to that CD on my iPod for the past week - I love it. Songs like:

Bohemian Rhapsody - arguably the best song by one of the greatest bands of all time - QUEEN.

Foxy - Jimi Hendrix - my daughter Sarah's favorite from the movie and the CD - she can do the shimmying, twitching dance Dana Carvey does in the movie - cracks me up

Ballroom Blitz - Tia Carrere's version, not the original by Sweet. Still, a great song. I remember it was a challenge to learn and spit out all the words - really, you're not singing along are you?

Dream Weaver - Gary Wright - I honestly didn't remember the song until it got to the chorus. I always associate it with the soft lighting and wind machine of those scenes from Dana's imagination.

Feed my Frankenstein - Alice Cooper. Hmmm, I wonder what Alice was thinking about when he wrote this little gem? Nasty. I know only a few Cooper songs, I like them more than I should admit. An acquired taste I know.

There's a lot of great songs - some better than others. Anyway, what are you listening to? I'm up for anything.