Wednesday, May 14, 2008


I was listening to the radio in the car yesterday and nearly drove off the road trying to change the station when an ad for Jared Jewelers started playing. I HATE THEIR JINGLE. That's Jared! I cannot tell you how much it annoys me. Of course, since I'm sitting in traffic in Northern Virginia - a little window into hell - it got me thinking of other services and products I will never buy or use because of their jingle. In all fairness, this is no reflection on the quality of their product or service, it's just me. Music is a powerful thing - didn't you learn your ABC's as a song? How about conjunctions? "Conjunction Junction what's your function?" It's just that for me, their plan worked in reverse. Yes, I remember you, but I twitch when I hear your name. Jared isn't the jingle I hate most - it's just the one that triggered the sense memory of heinous jingles.


Daisy Sour Cream.
Easily the jingle I hate most in the world. I hate it with the firey passion of a thousand suns.

Empire Flooring. A close second to Daisy,
the phone number then the voice sliding over the word Empire followed by TODAY! AAHHHHH! I will live with dirt floors before I use them for flooring.

Kraft Krumbles - They're krumbelievable! Mr. Ad Man, you deseve a boot to the berries for this one.


Folgers Coffee
- If the best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup, your life sucks. Sorry. A fact's a fact.

Anyway, this has been somewhat theraputic. I'm better now.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Happy Mother's Day!

This was our Mother's Day Tribute at church last year. It's based on a sketch by the hilarious Barats and Bereta - we used their idea, made it G-rated for church - and this was the result. I think they did a pretty good job. Enjoy.

Friday, May 9, 2008

What's on your iPod?


I just bought the Wayne's World CD for $1 at the Library. It's one of my favorite guilty pleasures - I movie I stop and watch even if it's halfway through when I find it. I know it isn't fine art or high cinema - but dang it, it's funny. Twice a year the Library has a massive used book sale - it's awesome. I got 15 books by authors like Augusten Burroughs, Anita Shreve, Frank McCourt, Wally Lamb, Jed Rubenfeld ... AND my CD for $18! I felt like a fat kid at a buffet. Seriously - it was fan-freaken-tastic. I just wished I had remembered it in advance so I could have shopped more and spent more. >: ) Anyhoo, I've been listening to that CD on my iPod for the past week - I love it. Songs like:

Bohemian Rhapsody - arguably the best song by one of the greatest bands of all time - QUEEN.

Foxy - Jimi Hendrix - my daughter Sarah's favorite from the movie and the CD - she can do the shimmying, twitching dance Dana Carvey does in the movie - cracks me up

Ballroom Blitz - Tia Carrere's version, not the original by Sweet. Still, a great song. I remember it was a challenge to learn and spit out all the words - really, you're not singing along are you?

Dream Weaver - Gary Wright - I honestly didn't remember the song until it got to the chorus. I always associate it with the soft lighting and wind machine of those scenes from Dana's imagination.

Feed my Frankenstein - Alice Cooper. Hmmm, I wonder what Alice was thinking about when he wrote this little gem? Nasty. I know only a few Cooper songs, I like them more than I should admit. An acquired taste I know.

There's a lot of great songs - some better than others. Anyway, what are you listening to? I'm up for anything.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Another Sign of the Apocolypse

I rarely watch network TV - the only reality shows I've ever purposefully watched more than once are Last Comic Standing or Project Runway (mainly 'cause I knew one of the models and really wanted her to do well), but I digest. Not that I'm highbrow in my comedy choices - I watch BBC & love British humor. But, I do have my standards. In yet another sign of the decline of Western Civvilization and further evidence that if God does not destroy us all in a fiery display of His wrath He'll owe Sodom and Gomorrah an apology, I bring you Single and Special. Really, after that girl on Flavor of Love pooped on a rug during a very special episode, it was just a matter of time. The end is near my friends. Get your sunscreen.

Single and SpecialGreenlit cable dating show from established production company seeks mentally disabled male and female contestants of all ages and races.
"Single and Special" will be a tasteful mix of "The Bachelor" and "Life Goes On." "Single and Special" already has the endorsement of the Special Olympics. Pilot available upon request.

Tri-State area contestants preferred. Will have mental health care professionals on set at all times.

Please email photo and short bio, with dating history, to SingleandSpecial@gmail.com.

* I haven't been able to find aother info on the show - let's pray it isn't real.

Virginia Wasn't for Lovers


Mildred Loving, matriarch of interracial marriage, dies

NOTE: I grew up in Canada so much of the racial tension and history here is the U.S. is foreign to me. Canada has it's own set of cultural & social tensions -it's simply that I didn't grow up with it so I forget how recent it is. I live in VA now, so this story was a reminder to me of how very recently Virginia wasn't for lovers.

By DIONNE WALKER
Associated Press Writer

RICHMOND, Va. (AP) -- Mildred Loving, a black woman whose challenge to Virginia's ban on interracial marriage led to a landmark Supreme Court ruling striking down such laws nationwide, has died, her daughter said Monday.

Peggy Fortune said Loving, 68, died Friday at her home in rural Milford. She did not disclose the cause of death.

"I want (people) to remember her as being strong and brave yet humble - and believed in love," Fortune told The Associated Press.

Loving and her white husband, Richard, changed history in 1967 when the U.S. Supreme Court upheld their right to marry. The ruling struck down laws banning racially mixed marriages in at least 17 states.

"There can be no doubt that restricting the freedom to marry solely because of racial classifications violates the central meaning of the equal protection clause," the court ruled in a unanimous decision.

Her husband died in 1975. Shy and soft-spoken, Loving shunned publicity and in a rare interview with The Associated Press last June, insisted she never wanted to be a hero - just a bride.

"It wasn't my doing," Loving said. "It was God's work."

Mildred Jeter was 11 when she and 17-year-old Richard began courting, according to Phyl Newbeck, a Vermont author who detailed the case in the 2004 book, "Virginia Hasn't Always Been for Lovers."

She became pregnant a few years later, she and Loving got married in Washington in 1958, when she was 18. Mildred told the AP she didn't realize it was illegal.

"I think my husband knew," Mildred said. "I think he thought (if) we were married, they couldn't bother us."

But they were arrested a few weeks after they returned to Central Point, their hometown in rural Caroline County north of Richmond. They pleaded guilty to charges of "cohabiting as man and wife, against the peace and dignity of the Commonwealth," according to their indictments.

They avoided jail time by agreeing to leave Virginia - the only home they'd known - for 25 years. They moved to Washington for several years, then launched a legal challenge by writing to Attorney General Robert F. Kennedy, who referred the case to the American Civil Liberties Union.

Attorneys later said the case came at the perfect time - just as lawmakers passed the Civil Rights Act, and as across the South, blacks were defying Jim Crow's hold.

"The law that threatened the Lovings with a year in jail was a vestige of a hateful, discriminatory past that could not stand in the face of the Lovings' quiet dignity," said Steven Shapiro, national legal director for the ACLU.

"We loved each other and got married," she told The Washington Evening Star in 1965, when the case was pending. "We are not marrying the state. The law should allow a person to marry anyone he wants."

After the Supreme Court ruled, the couple returned to Virginia, where they lived with their children, Donald, Peggy and Sidney. Each June 12, the anniversary of the ruling, Loving Day events around the country mark the advances of mixed-race couples.

Richard Loving died in a car accident that also injured his wife. "They said I had to leave the state once, and I left with my wife," he told the Star in 1965. "If necessary, I will leave Virginia again with my wife, but I am not going to divorce her."

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Today

Today I hate:

1. Waking up waaaay too early on a Saturday I should have been sleeeping in because my spring allergies are fierce and I want to swallow a hairbrush so I can adequately scratch my itchy throat.

2. The neighbor's dog. Stupid Max. Stop. Barking. See Max. See Max bark. See Max bark some more. See Max bark and bark and bark and bark. See Max get chased by the crazy lady. Run Max run. Oh, poor Max.

3. The carpet in my house. I hate carpet. The sinner who sold us the house installed the cheapest quality carpet in the western hemisphere. Carpet is a generous term. Actually so is installed. Seriously. There are speed bumps in the upstairs hall. Think nappy acrylic sweater balled up on the floor of your closet. That's my carpet.

4. Finances. We have good jobs, are paid fairly and live modestly. Where the crap does the money go?

5. Dusting. I don't mind housework - I actually enjoy some of it and keep a tidy house. But dusting? Dusting makes my teeth itch. You don't really get rid of the dust, you just move it around and make the room smell like artificial lemons for a minute. AAAAAAGGGHHH!

6. Shut. Up. Max.

7. Hannah Montana. Not Miley Cyrus - the Hannah Montana TV show. It bumped LOST on our DVR because it was a higher priority program so only half of it taped. WHAT?

Today I love:

1. My husband. That one doesn't change day to day. Some days I like him more than others...

2. My dog Sophie. Sigh. She's nice.

3. Kleenex with lotion. My poor afflicted nose.

4. My bed. Nice, fresh sheets - high thread count. Ahhh.

5. Wireless internet. Laptop in bed. Yay for being lazy on Saturday morning. Just because I'm awake doesn't mean I have to be up. >: )

6. My backyard. We opened the pool yesterday and i can see it from my window. Pretty.


I'm done. I need a cup of tea. What about you? What do you love/hate today?

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Lessons Learned from the Drunk Girls of MySpace




From the evil geniuses at Asylum For All Mankind, I bring you Lessons We Learned from the Drunk Girls of MySpace.
Girls, I don't know who you are, and by the look of some of these photos, you probably aren't clear who you are either, but you need better hobbies. The internet is unforgiving girls. Someday, your kids are going to find these and there goes those hours of lectures on the evils of alcohol...



You partied with friends, right?


I wonder how many diseases you can catch from a frat bathroom floor. I bet she knows.



If you're okay with this being the way you get home, you're in trouble. Never mind, you won't remember.



Niiiice. Very sexy. Boys love a girl covered in the (former) contents of her stomach.



You can't buy class like that. Wait, maybe you can pay for it...